​​A memo to 21st century parents, written by Igbafe Oluseye
Few weeks ago, I was at the local airport and as I waited in the departure lounge, I noticed there were many children roaming about but it was understandable since it was summer holiday.
One other thing I noticed was the way most of the children were dressed. Most of them, especially the girls, were dressed in bum shorts, halter necks, cut off jeans, etc. The clothes in themselves weren’t the issue per se; it was the overall look of the children that had me bothered. That was definitely not the first time I noticed it.
A few months before, I had taken my kids to a birthday party and found myself in what could easily have been a night club for kids. Scanty clothing such as tight or very short clothes, bum shorts, long weaves, etc, seemed to be the dress code. I noticed my son glancing around, probably wondering, “What in God’s world are these other children wearing?” Or something like that. Not long after, the kids were called out to dance to the hit songs of the season – these songs in my opinion should be rated PG 16. 4 – 6 year olds trooped to the dance floor, miming the sexually explicit songs and gyrating their bodies in the most sensual manner. 
They could have given Beyonce a run for her money. They ran their hands over their bodies, shook their booties hard while their parents cheered them on. The boys had their upper shirts unbuttoned and rapped along perfectly to gangsta raps while doing flawless break dance. Those who danced like actual children where shooed off the dance floor while the lewd ones were cheered on. As I watched, my child stared out of this circle looking longingly at the others dancing. I knew it was time to leave.
As we left, we went to an eatery where I bought them ice cream and gently explained to them the concept of decency and dancing with decorum. Another time, at a game arcade for kids, I ran

into a lady who had made-up her kids’ faces like they were mannequins for Tara or Mac beauty products. Their skirts were so tight, that running up and down the slide was uncomfortable for them. So the question is, why are we sexualizing our kids? Why does your 4, 6 or 9 year old girl have to look like a chick? Why does she have to be hot or sexy? Should your 8 year old son go around with a comb in his hair and his pants sagged almost to his ankles?
If your child wears bum shorts out of the house at age 3, why should she be expected to wear longer ones at 15? If she wears 2 rings and 12 bangles at 6, why won’t she pierce a second ear hole at 17 and her bellybutton at 19? Why won’t your son pierce his own ear at 15? Are you setting your children up to be immodest and indecent? What trend are you starting them on? That all these are fashionable or trendy doesn’t mean it’s ok. What happened to children wearing dresses?
Children can look very nice and decent, they can be well covered and still look good. In this age, when children are being abused. Is it wise to make your child an object of anyone’s sexual attention? When I hear some children belt out sexually explicit lyrics, I ask myself how they became exposed to this songs!
As a parent, you can’t play the CD of such songs and not expect your children to pick them up; the same goes for watching Mtv Base, Channel O, etc with your children. Studies have shown that children exposed to a high level of sexually explicit information tend to become sexually active early. Is that your goal as a parent?
Being a parent involves sacrifice. You will need to avoid listening to such music where your children are. Most of those lyrics demean women and teach your daughter that she’s just a sex toy and her body is for squeezing. It teaches the boys that money is everything and women are things to be used to satisfy their primal urges.
WRITTEN BY 

IGBAFE OLUSEYE

​Are you grounded and running out of fuel? Tired of living? Frustrated with life and everybody? Seems like life has been most unfair to you? Nothing is working in your favour, in fact it seems you are always getting the short end of the stick. 
Giving the current economic downturn, the rising cost of living, and the attendant effects on every aspect of life, one is bound to be frustrated and be on the edge. Businesses are struggling to make it and families are feeling the crunch. The government is struggling and seems befuddled. 
The natural reactions to all these should be venting out, frustration, and anger, but all these can’t solve any problem. Suicide is not the solution, lashing out at your spouse or children will only aggravate the situation. If you also keep looking up to the government for solutions, you will add to your disappointment. 
So where do we look up to? This is the time to look up more than ever. This is the time to look up to God. I am not asking you to look up to your Pastors or Imams or other Spiritual leaders. A number of them are as perplexed as you are, so they may not be of help. 
 We are in the season when spiritual antennas must be very sensitive to the leading of God. It is the time to vent your feelings out to God and seek Him earnestly. It is not time to give up because this phase will surely pass, and God will raise new leaders and influences during this storm. 
Rather than give up or do something drastic, connect to heaven’s wavelengths, God is unleashing uncommon transformational ideas and He is looking for tested and trusted hands to trust with end time resources. 
So if you are grounded, it may actually be to your own advantage. Planes need the runway to take off into the sky, likewise being grounded gives you the opportunity to reconnect with heaven. Don’t give up, look up and be encouraged. 
Be on the lookout for a series on Capping the Year. 
Good morning and Stay blessed! 
Adewumi Oni

08028395824

09095321147

wumioni@yahoo.com

http://www.adewumioni.com

Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/adewumi.oni

Twitter: onadol2010

Still on Cultural factor, checking organizational culture fit is not just enough, the candidate must fit into the culture of the environment where the venture is located. Sometimes induction and reorientation help in this regards, but this depends on the candidate’s willingness to accept other culture. This is why some people find it difficult connecting with customers in their new environment. They may be averse to the culture and unwilling to learn or adapt. These are extreme and radical people. You therefore need to ensure that the candidate profile fits into both organizational and environmental cultures.

 

Language factor: Closely related to Cultural factor is language factor. Does the candidate speak both the business language and the locality’s language? How well can he converse both internally and externally? Can he easily learn the language? In case of expansion beyond the national frontiers, does he speak other languages that can be an added advantage? These are some of the relevant questions to answer before selecting a candidate.

 

Finally, there is the sixth sense factor, but it is only used by those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern the right or wrong candidate. This is called gut feeling or instinct. As a leader, you need to develop your sixth sense, so that even after considering all the other factors, you can apply your sixth sense for final judgment.

 

I wish you all the best as you make up your team.

 

Stay blessed.

 

Good afternoon!

 

Adewumi Oni

08028395824

09095321147

wumioni@yahoo.com

http://www.adewumioni.com

Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/adewumi.oni

Twitter: onadol2010

Today we will look at two more factors.

Personality Factor: The person behind the person is more important than the person. That sounds confusing isn’t it? It sounds like a repetition but it is beyond that. Knowing the name, skills and experience of a person is quite different from knowing the temperament of the person. He can have a nice look and solid Resume but with a temperament ill-fitted for the role in mind. The real person behind every name is revealed by the temperament.

 

If your venture is a customer facing type, you won’t want to recruit a shy and introverted person as your Front Desk staff. Front Desks are for people with outgoing dispositions, and the introverts are more suited for back office roles. It is therefore important to know the temperament of your candidates before you sign them on. How do they handle stressful situations? How do they handle pressure? Your screening test must be designed such that the personality of the candidate is revealed.

 

Cultural factor: There are two aspects to the Cultural factor, these are Organizational Culture and Environmental Culture. It is important that whoever you are considering as part of your team fits into both your organizational culture and environmental culture. Cultural misfit can cause serious trouble for any venture. The candidate must fit into your organizational culture and also be able to adjust to the culture of the environment in which your venture operates. Some people excel in an environment devoid of too many rules, while some are process and rule oriented. You must ask questions that will reveal the cultural orientation of your candidates.

 

We will pause here today and continue tomorrow.

 

God bless us all.

 

Good morning!

 

Adewumi Oni

08028395824

09095321147

wumioni@yahoo.com

http://www.adewumioni.com

Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/adewumi.oni

Twitter: onadol2010

Until the door to a room is opened you cannot access the contents of the room, unless you break in. Sometimes we go shopping in malls and find some shops closed, maybe for the day or for some reasons. At such times, though we can see the contents of the shop through the glass, we can’t buy because the door is locked. 
Likewise in life, we often have what it takes for some positions or jobs or appointments but we don’t get them because the door has not been opened to us. No matter how hard you struggle, if the door is not opened you can’t get it. It is therefore important that we know the factors that can trigger a door to open. This will be the focus of our discussion in this series. 
1. Integrity: One of the rarest attributes in our world today is integrity. It is this rarity that is largely responsible for failure of leaderships. Integrity is the quality of being honest and fair, or a  state of completeness or wholeness. Integrity is also doing what is right whether you are being watched or not. Another word for integrity is honesty. It is a state of honesty of actions, intentions and words. Being true to your actions, intentions and words. In the race for wealth, many people have thrown away this rare and precious  attribute. 
When people are being sought to occupy a position, integrity is one of the key attributes looked out for in the candidates for such positions. And integrity is not just something you own, it is something also perceived by others. You own it, but it is perceived by others. It is those who have perceived this in you that will recommend you for such positions. It may be positions you ordinarily would not have had access to or be aware of, but your integrity will make someone recommend you for the position. 
Integrity still opens doors and will keep opening doors, so you need to guard it if you still have it, or start repairing it if yours has been damaged. 
God bless us all. 
Good morning! 

Yesterday I was observing my okro garden and I saw something that is worth sharing. I observed that some of the plants have grown taller and bigger than some others, even though they were planted the same day. It caught my curiosity and I began to meditate on why the huge difference. 
Here are two reasons and lessons from this scenario:
1. Access to Water: I observed that the ones that are taller are closer to the source of water than the other,so they are growing faster than the others. Water brings life, and water can be likened to Grace. In our lives, we often wonder why some people seem to be moving faster than us. One of the reasons for this is Grace. Some people are just unmeritedly graced and they do things with ease. So instead of envying them, ask for Grace of Ease upon your life. 
Divine Positioning: I planted the seeds myself and I didn’t select one seed for one position, I just planted with open mind. But some of the seeds were fortunate to be not just near water, but far away from where people tread, so they are shielded from being treaded upon. Same way divine positioning can make a seemingly less knowledgeable person to achieve more than those who have all the qualifications. Pray to be divinely positioned friends. Often, location determines allocation. Why would someone with a score of 185 gain admission while another with 230 be denied admission? Because cut off marks for different areas are sometimes different. The race is not to the swift, neither is the battle to the strong… 
So while we are diligent in our work, let us also ask for Grace and Right Positioning so that our journey through life will be easier. 
God bless us all. 
Good morning! 
Registration for the ‘Step Out of the Confines of Comfort’ seminar ends today, ensure you book your place today. 
Hope to see you there. 👍

You may not know that where you are now is a confine of comfort. Information brings about reformation, which leads to transformation. 
The purpose of this seminar is to spur us from wherever we are to hunger and thirst for more. It is going to be fun, exciting, informative, instructive and inspiring. 
Let us meet at Travel Lodge next Saturday by 10am. 
Speaking with me is Mr Peter Oshinoiki, an entrepreneur per excellent. 
Don’t miss this great opportunity. 
See you there!!!

We are all vessels for different purposes and assignments. We are useful to the extent of being allowed to be used by and of God for the different reasons He created us. We are tools in the Hands of God. We are as useful as we submit ourselves for His use. 
Just as we have different vessels in our home, for drinking, storing, eating, washing, conveying, etc, we are also vessels of different types in the sight of God. Also, just as we have vessels of different materials, wood, clay, aluminum, silver, gold and other precious metals, you are also a vessel of a kind. 
In our homes, the importance attached to a vessel is usually a function of the make (wood, clay, or gold), its beauty, and the price. Some vessels are kept only in the toilets and bathrooms because they are plastic and of little worth. Some are reserved for special guests like our porcelains, China wares and golden cutleries. In the same vein, we can be reserved for special purposes and occasions, or just be among the crowds. 
While it is God who decides who plays special roles or general roles, you can influence God’s choice by your actions, words, thoughts, and choices. If you make God your first priority always, He will make you a special vessel for a special purpose. 
You can be a special purpose vessel or a general purpose vessel by your choice of whom to serve and follow. The choice is yours. 
God bless us all. 
Good morning! 

Are you still bound by your past mistakes? Is that failure still holding you back? Are you keeping to yourself because of that last hurtful relationship? Are you afraid of investing again because of the last failed investment? Or you have become distrustful due to the betrayal you suffered in the hands of that trusted fellow? Or perhaps you have been dwelling on that last success so much that you don’t want to try new things? 
Hear this, nobody travels in a reverse gear. A driver drives facing the front windscreen and not the rear screen. As long as you keep looking into the past, you are driving in a reverse gear and that only takes you to one destination, BACKWARD. If you want to move forward, you must face the future and put the past behind you. 
The only business you have in the past is to draw from the lessons of your failures or successes. This is why your eyes are in the front and not behind. You are to look forward and move towards new goals. You have no business in the past. 
It is therefore time to get out of reverse gear and engage the drive gear. No matter how bad the past may have been, the future holds a lot of opportunities and promises, they are only waiting for you to walk into them. 
God bless us all. 
Good morning!