I came across a quote this weekend and I got inspired to share this broadcast with you. It says, “The difference between a corrupt person and an honest person is :The corrupt person has a price while the honest person has a value.”
Truly you can either have a price or a value. A price can be paid for, meaning you can be bought or compromised. If all you have is a price then your life and decisions will most likely be ruled by monetary factors or some rewards. Some rare stones are described as priceless due to the multiplicity of their usage. Some virtues are also said to be priceless, for example, patience is often said to be priceless. 
When what you have is a value, you have moved beyond the level of being moved by money or reward, what determines your decisions or actions are your values and principles. You become uncompromisable or incorruptible. You hold your principles far above any reward. Value is not something you can build by yourself, it takes the spirit of God in you to build it and say no to every compromising demand. 
One of the reasons for the mess in our world today is the abundance of people with prices and the scarcity of people with values. A society that places more emphasis on price than value is positioned for self destruction. Go for value and leave the realm of price. 
Have a great day and remain blessed

Adewumi Oni

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As we conclude this series, it is very important to stress the impact of prayer, a life of integrity and commitment on shaping our children’s lives. 

Prayer addresses the spiritual side of your children or wards or protégés and keep them from going astray. When you keep committing their hearts to their Maker, they will always find themselves being drawn back to the right side of life, even when they stray. 

Your integrity is infectious and can determine how faithful your children will be. How you keep your words and how you say the truth will rub off on them. When they find themselves at crossroad, the memories of your way of life may be the only guide between good and bad. That is why I said fathering is the most difficult job because it requires constant sacrifice and uprightness.
When you eat in your car and you wait till you get home before throwing the food pack in the bin, you can be sure that is exactly what your children will emulate, and if otherwise you know the result. If you are always lying, your children will find it so easy to lie. You are their mirror, they see themselves in you, so you determine what they see.  
Lastly, being committed through the thick and thin builds your children to be dependable, steadfast, strong, and committed. Stay through every course you choose. Complete every project you begin. Don’t run away from challenges,otherwise your children will always choose the path of least resistance, which hardly leads anywhere. 
As you work on becoming a better Father, you are laying a strong foundation for your children to be greater than you. 
May we not fail our children and generations to come. 
Have a blessed day. 
Adewumi Oni

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​Destiny Moulder: Your role as a father includes shaping destinies and lives. This is perhaps one of the most important aspects of fathering, yet the least appreciated. You can father individuals, states and even nations. Nations fail when the fathers in the nation fail in their fathering responsibility. 
You must first understand that there are destinies that are tied to your destiny. If you fail to fulfil your destiny, those destinies attached to you may suffer delay or fail completely in fulfilling theirs. 
As a father, you must see fulfilling God’s divine purpose for your life as your primary pursuit. It is in identifying and pursuing your destiny that you can become a guider or moulder of other destinies. Many of those we call touts are products of unguided or misguided destinies. Where you are today is a result of being moulded by some people. Consciously investing and taking interest in your children and wards’ lives is necessary to help them find their purpose and fulfil it. 
Refiner: To refine means to purify or to make finer. You purify by removing impurities. Through the Word of God and a transparently pure character, you are to help your children become as pure as they can be. If you have the right connection with your children, when you mirror your life after the Word, your children will mirror their lives after you. 
You must therefore ensure you are as refined as possible before you can refine your children. Children are more inclined to follow your actions than your words. Yours character can either refine or pollute those around you. You are either a refiner for your children or a pollutant. Be a refiner and not a pollutant. 
Stay tuned for the next broadcast in this series. 
Have a great week ahead and stay blessed.  
 

Adewumi Oni

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​As a father, you are meant to raise fathers of homes, communities, businesses and even nations. You must get to a point where you see fathering beyond just child bearing, but the act of consciously building destinies. It is a great responsibility and one not to be lightly treated. 

6. One of your roles as a father is that of an Arbitrator, more like a judge, an incorruptible one who exercises justice with a sense of fairness, equity and true conscience. As an Arbitrator, you will settle dispute between your children and wards, you must not be seen to be partial. Your children are watching you and they know if you are fair or not. Your sense of fairness or unfairness will be transferred to them. Corrupt judges usually learn corruption from childhood. You will also settle dispute in your neighborhood and community. You must not allow material gains influence your decisions. The Great Arbitrator sits in heaven and He knows everything you do. 
7. As a guider, your actions and inactions have a way of influencing and guiding your children and people who are looking up to you. They will come to you for guidance. If you are not guided you cannot provide any guidance. So the question is who is guiding you? Many have left their guidance in the hands of pastors, prophets and spiritual leaders, some of whom have lost touch with heaven. When the blind leads the blind there will be calamity. Let God be your Guide and you will be able to guide others. 
8. Your greatest role as a father is that of a teacher. You must teach your children godly values upon which the foundation of their character will be laid. You must teach them how to deal with the vicissitudes of life. Teaching is one of the toughest tasks of a father because it requires matching your actions with your words, so you don’t just teach in words, you must match your actions with your teaching. 
When we play our roles well as fathers, we will have less problems in our world. 
Stay blessed and enjoy your day. 
Adewumi Oni

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“The heart of a father is the masterpiece of nature.” –  Abbe Prevost

A father has to be a friend, teacher, role model, and a disciplinarian, all in one. You have to learn to wear different hats at different times. One of such hats is being your children’s best friend. One of the roles of fathers is to be the best friend of their children. 

Best Friend : Your best friend is someone you like and share your secrets with. It is someone you always want to spend your time with. As a father, your children should be looking forward to jumping into your arms after work. You shouldn’t be too busy to sit with them and tell them stories and help them out with their homework. Spending quality time with your children helps in forming a deep bond with them. It is at such times that children pick traits from their father that will be the bedrock of their character. Kindness, patience, gentleness, self discipline and other virtues are usually imbibed by children through close observation of their fathers. Vices are also learnt the same way. 

If you make friends with your children, they will mirror their lives after you. This is the reason you must be the best friend of your children, if you want to raise great sons and daughters. 
Defender : In the same vein, you are your children’s defender. They expect you to defend and protect them against internal and external threats or danger. They implicitly believe in your ability to fight for them. It is important that you don’t betray this trust, because it can lead to crack in the character of your children/ward. Be there for them when they are ill. Be there for them when they are being bullied. Just ensure you don’t let them down when they need you most. 

Stay tuned for the next broadcast. 

Adewumi Oni

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​Let us take a deeper look at the roles of Fathers in continuation of this series. We will look at the first three in this part and continue with the rest in subsequent part of this series.  
1. Role Model: Children are imitators. They look at how you sit, talk, walk and try to imitate you, even up to mannerisms, especially if they are fond of you. Your child will naturally want to be like you, it is therefore important that you conduct yourself well. For example, if you are walking on the road with your son and you are pressed to urinate. If you stop on the road to urinate, don’t be surprised if your son also starts urinating. He may not understand that it is not a good habit, because he has seen you doing it, he feels cool doing same. The rule is whatever you don’t want your child to do, don’t do it. 

2. Provider: As a father, you are the breadwinner for your home. You are the primary provider of resources for your home. Don’t shift your responsibility to your wife or anyone else, otherwise your sons may grow up believing it is not their responsibility to provide while your daughters may grow up struggling for leadership of the home with their husbands. Pray and work hard to provide for your home, sometimes you may need to deny yourself of certain comfort. Your children will notice your sacrifice and it will help instil selflessness in them. 

3. Decision Maker: One of the most important duties of the Father is decision making. You will have to take decisions from time to time, both major and minor decisions. The more your children see you taking correct decisions, the more they want to be in a position to make decisions too. How you take your decisions also matters. If you seek opinion of your wife or even the children before deciding, the children will likely grow up carrying others along in their decision making moments. This is important for their career. Most dictators grow up with parents who dish out orders without carrying others along. 
Fatherhood is responsibility. You can raise a great child through proper fathering, which requires discipline, love, firmness, wisdom and the Grace of God. 

May God help us to be great fathers and make our children to be greater than us. Amen. 
Till we meet again in the next series, stay blessed. 

Adewumi Oni

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​​In continuation of our discussion, it is important to define parenting and put it in proper perspective. Merriam Webster Dictionary defines Parenting as ‘the process of taking care of children until they are old enough to take care of themselves, the things that parents do to raise a child.’ It also means raising someone as a child.
Parenting therefore is not a job for the biological parents alone, you can father someone’s else’s child. It is equally important to point out that parenting can be done directly or indirectly. It is direct when you are primarily responsible for the upbringing of the child or ward, while it is indirect when the child or ward chooses you as his or her mentor and assigns the responsibility of fathering to you, or when without your knowledge, someone decides to model his or her life after you.
Going by the word of God, children can’t be left on their own, especially in the developmental stage. That is why Proverbs 22:6 says, ‘Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.’ Children are to be trained upward till they can make decisions on their own. What you impart into them at their developmental stage becomes their guiding principles all through life.
Now, let us look at the role of each parent in parenting, starting with the role of a father. Fathering is one of the most important jobs in the world and the most enriching. Nothing gives such joy as to watch your children becoming great and knowing that you played your part well. Just as God smiles in approval to a true son, we also smile with pride when our children make us proud. Fathering is very rewarding, not just materially but in terms of positive contributions to societal growth.
Many unfathered fathers are occupying places of authority in our nation today and it is one of the reasons for leadership failure. ‘Nemo dat quod non habet’ meaning you can’t give what you don’t have. Some fathers too were not properly fathered, so they find fathering difficult and challenging. Many have also become victims of negative indirect fathering due to the failure or absence of the direct father. Who is your child’s role model? You or someone else?
To be able to father rightly, you need to understand the roles of a father. Some of the roles are:

1. Role Model

2. Provider

3. Decision Maker

4. Best Friend

5. Defender

6. Arbitrator

7. Guider

8. Teacher

9. Destiny Moulder

10. Refiner
We will continue tomorrow by examining each of these roles in detail. Stay blessed and enjoy your day.

Adewumi Oni

08028395824

09095321147

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Raising your children or wards is by no means a mean job. It is almost a lifetime duty. It may be apt to say parenting is one of the most important works, yet one of the jobs least prepared for. People go to colleges and universities to acquire skills and trainings to excel in the work place or business world, yet pay the least attention to being trained as a parent. 
The state of our world today is the direct reflection of the quality of parenting provided yesterday. Pant sagging, body piercing, tattoo designs, smoking and other juvenile delinquencies (sadly they are no longer restricted to the teenagers) are often the results of poor parenting. 
I feel sad each time I see these young ones involved in these vices or when I see parents doing things children shouldn’t be caught doing in the presence of their children and wards. It is therefore not surprising that we are increasingly  having young adults who are always looking for shortcut, or will always cheat in exams,  or who will never stay on queue, or who can’t even manage their finances and are always borrowing no matter how much they earn. 
The objectives of this series are:

1. To emphasize the importance of good parenting in building a great nation 

2. To train the trainers (parents) on being a good role model for their children or wards. 

3.  To speak to the hearts of our youth and cause a rebirth where necessary. 
My hope is that at the end of this series, as a parent you will be able to predict with some degree of certainty who your children or wards will become, or make adjustments where you have been erring. 
I enjoin you to stay with me in this series. Thank you and have a great week ahead. 
​Adewumi Oni

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